Look! A Post.

I think we should rename this place "Blogging Problems". There has been a distinct lack of posting in the past few months. I thought I'd try to redeem a bit of that, but it ended up mostly being somewhat grumpy reportings on the state of the pregnancy. However, the alternative is continued radio silence, so forthwith the ramblings of my tired and somewhat whiny mind (with a few positives at the end).

• This pregnancy, much more so than Natalie's, has impacted my ability to eat and my interest in food. I've had nausea every pregnancy, but this time it was much more severe, and lasted longer. Even once it passed, I have been much less interested in food, but still needing to eat frequently. Needing to eat a lot and not liking food, when you are a person who usually LOVES food is such a pisser. Grrr. I've thrown out homemade cookies that have GONE BAD because no one has eaten them. It's been over a month since we got our Girl Scout cookies and I have eaten one and 1/3 box out of three. I have NEVER had GS cookies in my house longer than a week! The ones from the open box are getting a bit stale, even! Stale Girl Scout cookies? That's a SIN! And yet? I'm gaining nearly as steadily as I did with N, and started out heavier than I did with her.
  
• Even during pregnancy, I feel a tension in caring for two kids, and compromises are being made. On the one hand, I have less energy for Natalie and have had many an evening when I just lay on the couch. I'm still nursing her, but if there's any milk left, it's very little indeed. While she's still passionate about nursing, the amount of time actually spent nursing is minimal. As for wee Carbo, s/he just isn't getting the kind of attention that the dynamo formerly known as Harpo did in utero.
  
• The biggest similarity to the first two pregnancies is the tremendous hit to my energy levels, motivation, and ability to get things done. I envy all those women who bounce around at 13 weeks saying, "Don't you love that second tri burst of energy?!" (And they really are out there. Just go to the due date boards on The Site We Love To Hate.) I did get a trickle of increased energy at 18 weeks... only to be felled by a cold a day later. It's still dogging me. I hope it will wrap up this weekend and I will have a bit more energy. Please.
  
• Time is passing much more quickly this edition. I am astonished to think that I am 19 weeks today, almost half done... except when I look in the mirror. There is one helluva belly sticking out already. It's comparable to what I looked like at 6 or 7 months last time and I'm not even 5 yet! Aack!
  

HOWEVER,

• I'm starting to be able to feel the baby move from time to time, and it's just as awesome as last time. It's equal parts reassurance - phew, it's still ok - and wonder - wow! There's really something in there! Cait has felt a few pokes, too. We're both greedy and want MORE!
• Natalie is very excited about the baby. Many evenings when we would otherwise have been nursing, she pats and pokes at my belly, sings to the baby, hugs the belly, and says, "Hi, baby!" (She also pushes on my belly with a devilish grin, saying "Push baby!" -- knowing she is not supposed to. We are in for it.) She talks a lot about sisters and brothers... though mostly sisters. "I have a sister!" she often says. (But don't think she's onto anything. This is the same kid who proclaims fairly often that "I a big boy!")
  

Lest you think I am a complete selfish brat, I do of course know we are so lucky to have this opportunity. Despite my whining, this really has been pretty easy so far and I am lucky that the only things I can complain about are the usual complaints of pregnancy. No matter the compromises and the fights which are sure to become commonplace in our house, we are so excited to be having another child to bring joy to our lives and companionship and challenge to Natalie's life.