Dude, Where's My Sperm?
Now, the subversive plans I mentioned yesterday DO involve stealing sperm... but I meant that WE'D steal our own sperm back from the RE and insem at home!!! Somebody else stealing it is COMPLETELY OUT OF THE QUESTION!
Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately, it remains to be seen) I don't think anyone did steal our sperm. Either the bank sent the wrong amount or the doctor's office has fucked up somehow. It doesn't really matter, because regardless of whose fault it is it will take much researching and phone calling and arguing before we can find out what happened, and I'm quite worried that we will get screwed in the end.
Only no one will get pregnant.