Blue is my favorite color, except when it describes my mood. It's been a pretty consistent shade for me lately (probably a robin's egg or cerulean rather than indigo), hence my lack of posting, Unlike some of my blogfriends, I tend to clam up rather than wax poetic (or beautifully, if achingly, prosaic) when depressed/anxious.
Anyway, I'm not in a terrible state but am looking at my options. Just wanted to let you all know that I do still exist (and I do read your blogs!) even if I'm not posting or commenting much.
I'm gonna hit post now before I delete this.
12 Comments:
I am sorry you are having a hard(ish) time. It is wonderfully amazing and joyful and completely the best thing ever to have a new sweet baby in your lives - it is also hard work and challenging in someways. Don't forget your hormones are still all over the place - it is still early early days - this time last year you were three months pregnant! And working and parenting are a tough combo at any age. Take care and look for options that allow you to be in the spaces that you need to be. (I hope that isn't too much and is just supportive which is what it is meant to be!)
By Clare, at 6:38 AM
Sorry you're having a crappy time. I'm like you--I get quiet when things aren't stellar as well. We'll all be glad to hear when things are brighter...yellow. :o)
By hd, at 9:10 AM
Blue. Blah. I'm with hd-- hoping for some yellow to mellow out the blue.
By Katie, at 9:21 AM
((hugs)) I'm so sorry that things are crappy right now for you. I've been thinking of you and we're really looking forward to this weekend. We bought our pumpkins yesterday! E got a white one... spooookkkky! Maybe the next couple weeks will bring some light into the dark you have found yourself in.
By Anonymous, at 10:09 AM
What everybody else is saying! We love you.
And...you may want to think about whether this could be PPD. It doesn't just hit right away. S (zoopals.wordpress.com) blogged about that back when J was around 6 months old.
By Anonymous, at 10:41 AM
Thanks, everybody.
And, it is PPD. No doubt about that. But I also have a lifetime history of depression/anxiety stuff. Anyway, demons get smaller when you let them out, and this one is already shrinking a bit just because it's getting a little oxygen - and because I'm getting love from you guys. Cait and I are getting other support systems (exercise, shrinks, maybe meds) going, too.
By Jen, at 10:47 AM
Blue happens, and it hits a lot of us. We just don't always talk about it.
Thanks for sharing.
By Shelli, at 11:17 AM
This is strange, because my post for today was also going to be titled Blue. But I didn't post it because I was too blue to. So PPD, eh? Sometimes I wonder if mine is PPD or just plain old D. I really hope that you are able to find some things that will help. You are great, and I'm rooting for you... and sending some big hugs.
By lagiulia, at 3:38 PM
Hugs. M
By Anonymous, at 8:15 PM
More {{{hugs}}}
By Anonymous, at 11:10 PM
hate that you are going through some blues.
I wish I had advice, but I'll just send you hugs.
xoxo
By Calliope, at 8:10 PM
If you're into vitamins/supplements you might want to do a little research on 5-HTP if you aren't already familiar with it. I like it a lot for depression/anxiety.
By Unknown, at 4:05 PM
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